30 Days of Gratitude ~ Day 20 "Newborn Experience"

Treasured Moment #9
The day I held my daughter for the first time.  This is a bittersweet memory because it very clearly marked my downward spiral into a deep depression. Yet, was acutely aware of how long we had been waiting for that special day to come.  I still feel guilt over how disconnected I was from the whole experience- labour, delivery, and holding your newborn for the first time were supposed to be life changing moments.  It all felt like an out of body experience at the time, like I was eavesdropping on a stranger.  Looking back at the "going home" hospital pictures gives me a twinge of remorse. I wish I could back and tell the woman in the picture that everything was going to work out "this too shall pass".

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